The author considers how people are assumed to cope following a meaningful loss. Specifically, the following bereavement theory assumptions are examined: that shock or denial is inevitable following loss; that letting go & acceptance is necessary, & that working through loss is an adaptive process requiring cognitive, emotional, & physical energy in re-establishing to the body’s new homeostasis. Although bereavement researchers have examined assumptions systematically, they fail to acknowledge the important role played by cognitive development & private communication with the self. A discussion of the Cognitive Equilibrium Model of the grief process illustrating an individual’s general response to grief & loss is presented. (23 refs.)