“I didn’t do it!”: Lived experiences of suicide attempts made without perceived intent or volition

Suicide is considered to be a conscious and intentional act that is carried out within a social and cultural context. This study examines the unique phenomenon of a cluster of suicide attempts conducted without perceived intent, ideation, plan, volition, or agency in a remote province in Central Asia. This study investigated the lived experiences of individuals who made such unintended suicide attempts and examined the differences between these experiences and those of individuals who made their suicide attempt with intent and agency. The authors conducted a secondary analysis of qualitative data originally collected for a prior grounded theory study. The present study examined a specific and unique set of participant experiences related to suicide attempts made without agency. Results found that instances of suicide attempts made without perceived intent by participants included themes of impulsivity, not knowing what happened, feeling out of control, attributing these experiences to the supernatural, and being fearful of such events occurring again. Clinical practice may need to be adapted to address experiences of such unique suicide attempt experiences. In addition, further research is warranted to understand and examine the phenomenon of suicide attempts carried out without perceived intent, ideation, plan, volition, or agency.